Day Twenty-Three: On moving as the 10th circle of hell

I promised myself I wouldn't complain about the new place in all it's shiny newness. I promised I wouldn't say one word to tarnish the wonderful white on white image of this gloriously white apartment. I promised.

So.

I won't say anything about the smoke detector above the stove (ABOVE THE STOVE) that went off while I boiled water for my FIRST DINNER EVER and I won't say anything about the washing machine that stopped draining and preceded to flood the whole kitchen while I tried to finish my first load of laundry EVER or that after I wrestled my clothes out of the washer (after a certain roommate broke the door) and into the dryer the dryer turny-on knob thing snapped off and so my clothes just sat, wet, for an entire night. I especially won't mention the brand-new amazing AE jeans that BLED BLUE OVER EVERYTHING despite the tag that said ready to wash with like colors.

Nope. Not saying a word.

I will say that the Dog the Bounty Hunter Season Finale is on tonight and I could just about kiss my manager for calling and asking if I would like the night off. Would I? Would I? Would. I. Ever.

God bless slow Wednesdays.

Day Twenty-Two: Annoyed

The most annoying trait a person can have is the tendency to be passive aggressive. Seriously, say what you need to say and if you don't have the guts to say it out loud than it is obviously not important enough to be said at all.

Day Twenty-One: Thinking

Dog the Bounty Hunter better be mother fucking brilliant this season because my goddamn T.V. was so heavy I thought my arms were literally going to come out of my sockets while I wrestled it up the stairs. In fact, every show I even think about watching better be absolutely Emmy deserving or I'm suing the networks for physical damages.

Shows I'm watching:
Supernatural
Dog the Bounty Hunter
Southland
The Office
Dexter

Shows I'm thinking about watching:
Trauma
Leverage
College
Jockeys

Do you see, now, why I need OnDemand and DVR? I simply don't have time for all the time I plan on wasting in front of the boob tube.

Day Twenty: Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

I re-watched Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil again today.

This film from Clint Eastwood is based on my one of my favorite books (a book I can't believe I left off my impact list). The nonfiction piece, by John Berendt, is an embellished account of a Savannah murder. Savannah being the picture-perfect town on the coast of Georgia, deep in the Old South. Something about the aged South with her cotillions and loaded guns is just so romantic. I think both the film and the book capture the ideal of Savannah while also shedding light into her shadows.

There are holes (as my mom will be quick to point out) but overall the dialogue is memorable and the cinematography is gorgeous. Plus, John Cusack is absolutely edible. In this film: a gay Kevin Spacey, a hussied-up, high-as-a-kite Jude Law and a cross-dressing black man with attitude. What more could you ask for?

Worth it? Absolutely, but, I will say: the book is better.

Day Nineteen: Distracted

Must update blog. Too tired to think.


Work was a whilrwind shit show. Fun. But fucking-a, intense.

Day Eighteen: Gotta love comcast

Thank you to the Comcast rep who ended our conversation like this: I thank you very much for doing business with us and it's my pleasure to have assisted a wonderful and valued person today.

Awesome. I am both wonderful and valued.

Day Eighteen: Forbidden Lies

I watched Forbidden Lies the other day with my mamushka.

Did anyone read the book Forbidden Love? I could lie and say that I did but I didn't. Apparently, it's about a Muslim girl in Jordan who, after being caught shticking it to a Christian soldier, is murdered by her father and brothers in an honor killing. It's based on a true story, according to the author.

The book, I guess, is bullshit. Make-believe. Fake. Not true. Fiction. This film? It breaks down the lies. The writer? A con-woman. Fucking good at it too, I'd say.

Anyways, I totally recommend this film.

The thing is, honor killings? They happen. Every day they happen. In Jordan and Saudi Arabia and even in North America. An "honor" killing is when a father or brother kills their daughter or sister because she broke some Muslim law. Arbitrary laws. And these killings? In a lot of places they come with light sentences or no sentence at all. What makes me sick, even more than the fact that this goes on, is the fact that Khouri trivialized it by lying about it. Her book shook a lot of people up and it opened a lot of eyes and now? We're back past square one. If she had just said: this is fiction, but it very possibly could have happened. Stories like this happen everyday. But no, she lied and then when she was caught lying? She continued to lie. Today? She's still lying.

Check it out:

Day Seventeen: Guilty Pleasure #321

Supernatural.

Love. It.

I love Sam and Dean and their pseudo-incestual protective relationship. I love the demons and the vampires and the werewolves and all the "manly" crying and the men in pain. I love every second of every episode of this series. It's like Buffy meets hot men meets decent writing meets awesome special effects meets every horror film you've ever loved.

Thursday, 9 pm? I'm on my couch in front of the t.v. Please, refrain from calling me or texting me or trying to communicate with me in any way. Thank you.

Day Sixteen: Things I did today

-Slept in.
-FINISHED THE LAST OF THOSE GOD FORSAKEN TWILIGHT NOVELS. More to come, I promise. I have SO much to say about this sorry excuse for literature.
-Played with a 5 (6?) year old. Note to babysitters: Do NOT feed your charge pancakes made with marshmallows, chocolate, powdered sugar and cinnamon and THEN be surprised when they are absolutely bouncing off the walls. T, I am looking at you.
-I, Hanley Mead, went shopping. Legitimate I-don't-really-need-this-but-I'm-still-buying-it shopping. I got some super cute jeans that are long enough! Also, a new scarf and new shoes. Woah. And, only half of it was on sale. Yeah, seriously. Look at me spend.
-I DIDN'T watch the whole Dog the Bounty Hunter Marathon when I totally could have. I'm still watching the 10-11 hour (and you would too if you were at all awesome), BUT I didn't watch the first half. Look at me avoid guilty pleasures.

I'm sure your day was nowhere near as epic.

Day Fifteen: Happy September!

My favorite character from Citizen Kane (and yes, I did enjoy Kane, I did. I swear.) has the same name as my favorite bounty hunter.

Who knew?

More to come tomorrow. But first, I'm listening to this: Modest Mouse - Missed the boat, and you should be too.

Oh and yes, it very much is 3 minutes to midnight. I'm totally awesome with deadlines, I swear.